Are you sick of trying to be PERFECT?

Updated: May 23, 2018




First of all ....Nobody Is Perfect


The quest for perfectionism is a dark winding road. It leaves us disappointed time after time. 


I sit here to write this article and I don't know where to start. There is a deep drive from within me that wants to be eternally free from the expectations I put on myself. I am on a personal quest of transformation and growth. I want to offer you an insight into the methods I use in my life to move toward a deep sense of self-love. I am determined to inspire you to embrace your own imperfection. 


We can and we will set ourselves free.

I am grateful for all i was given. I am blessed with the looks that some would call ‘beautiful’. I have a strong healthy body, free from suffering and illness. However that's never been enough..unfortunately, society can influence us to believe that we aren't good enough. After speaking to women and men of all ages and backgrounds, I have gained insight into the pressure we all feel to be perfect. It's time to step up. I'm on a quest of deep love and I'm starting with re-wiring my brain. Its time to change our thinking, release the bullshit we have trapped inside that makes us feel inadequate.

Through sharing, we can inspire!

I have natural physical scars all over my body. I am a woman filled with adventure, impulse and curiosity. I am often fearless and of a rebel nature. Throughout my life, I have had many injuries, wounds and scratches. I mark and scar with hyperpigmentation, even a cat scratch will leave a dark brown scar on my skin. I have these ‘battle wounds’ all over my arms and legs. 

Sometimes the beast, or monkey, in my mind wins. I look down and I feel an immense shame deep in my heart. I feel the need to crawl into a ball and cry. Cry about how I will never be scar free, shed tears about how my skin will never be even and beautiful. In those moments I want to hide my skin because of the embarrassed i feel of these markings on my body. This pain is due to my false belief of perfection.

But now I choose. I choose love. I am re-wiring my thoughts. I'm learning that I don't want to be perfect. These markings on my body are here to teach me to love what i see in the mirror. They reflect my experiences. They show I have lived…


COMPARISON

Comparison creates unreasonable expectations. Every single person in the world is different. By comparing the way you look to others is a cycle of destruction. Begin with redefining who you are. Get a journal and write a list of all the things you enjoy about yourself or features that you have that make you unique. Next, to each word write bullet points on why these characteristics are positive. 

I often giggle at the thought of being perfect…. it would be so dull. Would you be friends with someone that thought they were PERFECT?

I'm sure in some ways it would be very frustrating, often boring and annoying to be friends with someone who was considered perfect. 


SELF COMPASSION

Through mindfulness, we can begin to treat ourselves as we treat others.

I have a very harsh self-critic, a voice in my head that has often told me that I'm not enough and  this voice is the first to critisize me in vulnerable situations 

It’s time to honour and accept the imperfections we are so lucky to have.

It’s time to develop a loving inner voice. Like the one of a parent. A voice that is warm, caring and full of kindness


COURAGE

Being original is fucking sexy.

When I come across a person who attracts me, it’s not their physical form I see, it’s their spirit. It is the personal glow and energy radiating from their being.  Being alternate is cool and refreshing in a society where many of us are trying to be the same.

Write a list of all the things that make you original, alternate and not ordinary. 

Embrace the things you enjoy, don't hide them. If you love the library, tell your friends, they may want to join you. Others will see your courage and it will inspire them to embrace their own differences and peculiarities.


POSITIVE THINKING

Positive thoughts have a positive effect on our lives.

Negative thoughts will have a negative impact on your life. We can never remove these thoughts from our head completely however, we can learn how to navigate the monkeys in our mind with presence. 

We need to witness and become aware of the negative thoughts and then choose to transform them or put them aside so we can continue with the things in our lives that matter. 


1. Witness -  the thought in your head, where is it coming from? Don't judge these thoughts but send them love and compassion.

2. Choose -  not to let the monkey mind win. It is only one small part of you- it isn't you. Develop your own strong inner voice. 

3. Transform -  the thoughts that don't serve you by passing them on to the universe or choosing to attach to something positive about yourself instead.


It is very cleansing to take a look at your life and environment. 

Find and remove triggers that make you judge, compare, or talk yourself down.

Think about cleansing these from your life. Remove people from social media that don't make you feel beautiful or good about yourself. 

Focus on more of the positive influences you have around you. 


<3 Isabelle



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